Confused

A ripple for every moment

Water smashed against a windshield, a hundred directions are revealed. Twisting and turning across the glass, drops moving about in varying mass. Liquid reproduction and honorable cooperation, to reach the outer limits of the crystal foundation. Disorder and a spontaneous design, convinces ambition to resign.

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This journal entry has been tagged with:

• God
• Christianity
• Genesis
• Worship
• Uncomfortable
• Bible Study
• Experiences
• Revelation
• Love
• Perspective

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Over the past couple years, I've developed strong opinions about worship. And over the last several weeks they have been obliterated. Looking back on these ideas about God and church, I've realized my own shortcomings but also the basic fundamentals of Christianity.

Today I was caught a little off guard as I sat in my usual corner at Genesis. After the first song came to an end, the worship leader asked us to greet each other. After greeting a couple people, a man ahead of me introduced himself then awkardly invited me to a bible study. He explained that he saw me sitting alone and felt compelled to invite me into a community of friends in Christ. At first I was at a loss for words. I didn't put on the right facial expression either as he stammered through his explanation. After the loss of words I became non-verbally defensive. "I'm not alone," I thought, which made no sense considering the situation. He finally asked me if I was interested. In attempt to make his efforts successful, I said yes. He quickly scribbled down some information for me and I thanked him.

I spent the next several minutes trying to comprehend what just happened. Then I had myself a little "mini" revelation.

When I go to worship, I have always tried to focus on God instead of the people around me. However, there have been many incidents where I get annoyed as people around me chatter and carry on as the music is lingering in the background or the speaker is trying to make his point. I used to feel that spending time with friends can be done outside of worship and that worship is just about God. And it is, but it's about His people too.

God wants us to have relationships. To show His love through us by loving on our family, friends, and strangers. We can grow the kingdom of God by offering the same love He has always given us. Without relationships, the kingdom of God could never thrive.

So as I sat there, pondering on my experiences, I felt a warmth in my heart. I can't say for certain whether I will participate in the bible study (due to scheduling issues), but I do know that it has given me a new perspective on God's plan for us and for me.

I don't know how I missed that part before, but I'm glad I got it all sorted out. God's peace on this lovely weekend.

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